Can a Rape-Victim Still Be Considered A Virgin?

Question:

I was a virgin until I was raped at 17. I was drunk, but I know I was raped. I have not had sex and don't plan to till I'm married.
Will I still be able to tell my husband I saved myself for him?
And the topic of "are you still a virgin" comes up all the time at school, what can I say without having to give my whole story?
Can I still call myself a "virgin"?
  
My Reply:
I've spoken with some female-friends of mine about this before, and the answer that always results is "yes, you can still call yourself a virgin."  Let me explain:
Sex is more than physical. It's also emotional and spiritual. Your first time wasn't by choice, so technically speaking, though physically you're not a virgin, if you continue to hold off until marriage, then you're still saving yourself...your whole self, for your husband. 
So yeah, telling your future husband that you saved yourself for him would be legit. But then I'd also think that if he wants to marry you, he'll accept the truth about what happened...you shouldn't have to keep it from him.

As for what to say at school, do you really have to say anything? Those who ask don't need to know, and often times, those who need to know either won't ask, or will wait until you're ready to tell them.

---Pastor Andy

No comments: